Hello and welcome back! Today is going to be about child support and where the fairness is in that.
Coming up is some talk of abortions and carrying out pregnancies.
There’s this one post on social media that says “If abortion is illegal then a man leaving a girl who’s pregnant should be illegal too, if women can’t back out of pregnancy neither should men”.
This is going to be our foundation for today’s post.
I’ll start slowly and get into the heated stuff later on.
Let’s start with abortions in general:
First of all, I know that I live in Austria where abortions technically aren’t illegal BUT as I found out there are only a few hospitals that actually do abortions, not even one per state and the doctors are free to decide if they want to perform abortions or not. So if you’re lucky you can get an abortion on one day but if you go to the hospital on another day and there is no doctor that wants to perform the procedure you’re fucked.
There are a two things that bother me: why did you even become a doctor if you’re not willing to provide women with basic health care and why doesn’t the government change that?
This is not going to be a pro abortions post, I am pro choice. I honestly have no idea how I would decide if I was in that situation and I hope that I never have to find out. I have actually given this a lot of thought though. And I don’t believe that abortion is murder, I think that this is what we’re taught to believe. A lot of women don’t even notice any changes up until the third month and chances for miscarriage are highest in the first trimester. If you personally feel like you would be killing a baby and are against abortions that is your personal decision but you should definitely give others the possibility to choose, therefore → pro choice.
Anyway, as you see even in countries where abortions are technically legal it’s not easy to actually get an abortion. Funfact, right?
So, if a woman is forced to carry out the pregnancy, why shouldn’t the father be forced to accompany her to all the doctor’s appointments etc.
This shouldn’t apply to toxic partners, rapists and other men who would harm the woman or the child. Let us agree on that.
But, if the woman has no way to back out of a pregnancy why on earth would the father be free to go just because he’s scared or says this child is not his. (Everyone knows it’s yours, Scott.)
Why would that be fair? Because, yes biologically the child has a stronger bond with the mother in the beginning because it spent 9 months in her womb. But like… the mother is making changes for 9 months, no drinking, eating carefully, not fitting into regular clothes, getting stretched out, pain of giving birth because she can’t abort the pregnancy and the dad just gets to walk away? Hell no!
What can we do to change this?
So, what kind of changes would we need to make to actually make this work in our current system? First of all, let’s make abortion a basic health care issue so they are available for everyone. Solved all of the problems listed above right there, isn’t that crazy!?
I had a conversation about this a while ago, if forcing the father to stay could actually work in our current system.
Because the truth is, that if abortion is illegal it is a direct choice about a woman’s body. And it’s made a feminine issue.
Which it really shouldn’t be because a child is a mixture of the DNA of two people who decided to have consensual sex and the pregnancy happened. So there is a couple when deciding to have sex, a couple conceiving the child and BOOM only the woman who needs to take care of the child.
Yes, it’s the woman who’s getting the abortion because she is also the one carrying out the pregnancy. But other than that?
The difference between men and women:
This is also why the whole “if you’re not ready to have children then don’t have sex” conversation is absolute bullshit. Because men get to have as much sex as they want and it’s not an issue, right? But women shouldn’t have sex right? I wonder how straight men have sex then?
Let’s take a look at this, shall we? If a woman has sex with 1 man and gets pregnant, she will have one baby a year. But a man can have sex multiple times per day and is therefore able to have at least 730 babies a year. Soooooooooo….why are we even discussing this? This is not a woman’s issue.
What are your options without abortions:
Another thing is that you can still put your child up for adoption so neither of the biological parents are forced to bring up the child. That is great!
But you have to undergo a process to be able to put the child up for adoption as well as 9 months of pregnancy.
And in my opinion the time that the mother has to spend with the child because abortions are illegal or unavailable should be obligatory for the father as well. Go to the doctor’s appointments, be considerate, look for a family for the baby, etc.
Because is it the woman’s fault that the pregnancy happened? No. Like I said and you hopefully already know, there are two people needed to conceive a child.
By the way did I just look up the term and another way to say “to conceive a child” is “to father a child”, what kind of fucked up term is this.
Right now it’s legally impossible to force the father to stay with the child throughout the pregnancy. That’s why we need awareness of topics like this. You don’t have to be in this situation to start thinking about it.
There are so many unresolved issues regarding how women are viewed in today’s society. So go out and talk to your fellow girl- and guy friends because we need to educate ourselves and others on topics like this.
What would you do if you were pregnant and in no position to bring up a child but abortions were illegal or you couldn’t find a doctor to perform the abortion? Would you want the father to stay?
Let me know what you think in the comments or via the contact form on the right.
Have a great weekend and see you next time!